Area Procrastinator Tells Boss he Works Best Under Time Constraints

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Mort Feebly, assistant manager at Supplies Surprise, is a man who has explored all the subtleties and nuances of the motto: “Work smarter, not harder.”  So, when his boss and sometimes friend, Herbert Sherbert, told the store about an opportunity in corporate, Mort didn’t miss a beat—he put it off until tomorrow.

We caught up with him at one of his many stopovers to Krispy Kreme and asked him why he wasn’t busy streamlining his inventory for tomorrow’s visit from corporate.

“Let me put it this way: I don’t feel my skill-set is being fully appreciated.  I’ve been looking for a way to show those suits what I can really do under pressure.  Some people call it procrastination, but I’m more of a “glass is half full” kind of guy—I call it being ‘clutch’.”

Later, we had a chance to sit down and talk to manager Herbert Sherbert and discuss Mort’s chances of landing the promotion.

“I’d say Mort has anywhere between a 0 and 100% chance,” Herb said aptly.

Regretfully, our interview was cut short because corporate came in early.

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