Christians Caught Celebrating True Meaning of Easter

Last month during the holiday known to the world as Easter—the holiday of innocent white, fluffy rabbits, decoratively painted eggs, and hordes of smiling children all gathered on plush lawns for The Hunt—a group of Christians were found doing something so bizarre it was almost criminal: they were celebrating Christ.

Interestingly enough, the person who stumbled in on the strange service was none other than the Easter Bunny himself. He recounted the details to us methodically, apparently in a bit of shock.

“I had just done three churches so I decided to take a break. I thought we were going to drink coffee, hear a short message on current events, and then I could help the little tykes hunt for eggs. But then they started talking about Jesus. Jesus Christ!” he said with horror. “Are they still allowed to do that in church?”

Apparently, a law student, a physics teacher, a homeless man, an IT consultant, a hostess, a mechanic, and a business owner were just some of the attendees seen at the event. And according to the man in the pink costume, the presence of such normal, rational human beings only added to the confusion.

“Believers actually believing? That’s crazy-talk,” said a dumbfounded minister from one of the churches down the street. “What is this world coming to?

When the law student was pressed as to why he was there he said, “Judges and juries trust single eye-witness reports all the time. So I’d say over 500 eye-witnesses along with other credible evidence of his resurrection is worth my trust.”

The same young man who witnessed the event decided against legal action in the end, though he did say it might be his only recourse if subjected to something like this again in the future.